Because 'E' asked..
'J' said he would quit drinking for a month. It was HIS decision and I didn't ask him to. I was happy he was going to but I told him to do it for himself and if he doesn't really want to then not to. Last thurs we went out and he was a couple weeks along with the no drinking when we went out for supper we sat in the restaurant so that he wouldn't be around beer in a lounge. That indicates he was still going with the no drinking plan (unless he was lying and pretending he was still sticking to it).
On friday the plan was for him to stay over at my place. He took forever to get there and when he finally did arrive he had wine and beer. The wine for me.. despite the fact that I told him I didn't want anything to drink when he asked if he should stop and get something. When he was pulling out the beer he goes 'oh who put these in there' I laughed and said (in a joking voice) 'I see your month of no drinking is going well'. He said (in a serious kind of snotty tone) 'I wasn't serious about that'. I was very annoyed. Not because he was drinking again but because he tried to cover up his change of mind by making it sound like I misunderstood.
He could tell I was annoyed and we started watching the movie he brought. While waiting for it to start he looks at me... and goes 'I see you are in one of those moods tonight'. To which I said I was perfectly fine until his comment. Now not only did he try and make me the one that was wrong about his drinking he also tried to make it that I was just in a mood and he did nothing wrong.
He also then told me that he only wanted one beer. That he just was working hard all week and figured he would relax with a beer. Which is a lie. He told me not that long ago that he found it pointless to have just one beer. That he doesn't even really like the taste of beer that much so when he has beer its with the intention of getting drunk.. otherwise its pointless to have one.
After the movie he left. I was suprised he was leaving but he said he had a stomach ache and wanted to go home. He made a joke that he was going to the bar to drink. He said he was joking but I honestly didn't believe it was a joke. I wanted to believe he went home but I really didn't. He lied to me already so why wouldn't he lie about that. The next day on the phone I asked him how the bar was and he was like I didn't go to the bar.. you really think I'd leave your place to go drinking all night. I said yes I do. I have no reason to not believe he would do something like that.
He was sick all day saturday (flu or hungover... I pick hungover) so he wasn't going to come to the concert with me if Darryl couldn't go. He said he would go but only if I couldn't get someone else to go. Strangely enough though he was fine on Sunday.
When we talked on Sunday we made plans to go out on Monday. He was supposed to call. He didn't.... not until 9. I finally gave up waiting and went out at 8:45. When I got home there was a message on my answering machine from him. He just said he was going to bed in an hour so to call if I get the message before then. Not one word about our plans or him not phoning.
The last time he stood me up it was because he worked until noon (was working nights) and slept late. Which was fine except that when he called he didn't say a word about standing me up. He acted like we didn't have plans. Until when he asked what I was doing I said I was waiting for a phone call from the person I had plans with. Thats when he apologized.
Yeah so he is very unreliable and doesn't think he does anything wrong. The first few months of dating someone is usually when you both are on your best behavior trying to impress the other person. If this is his best behavior... I would hate to see his behavior when the impress time is over.
Of course there were also other things that bothered me.. this was just what happened recent.
On friday the plan was for him to stay over at my place. He took forever to get there and when he finally did arrive he had wine and beer. The wine for me.. despite the fact that I told him I didn't want anything to drink when he asked if he should stop and get something. When he was pulling out the beer he goes 'oh who put these in there' I laughed and said (in a joking voice) 'I see your month of no drinking is going well'. He said (in a serious kind of snotty tone) 'I wasn't serious about that'. I was very annoyed. Not because he was drinking again but because he tried to cover up his change of mind by making it sound like I misunderstood.
He could tell I was annoyed and we started watching the movie he brought. While waiting for it to start he looks at me... and goes 'I see you are in one of those moods tonight'. To which I said I was perfectly fine until his comment. Now not only did he try and make me the one that was wrong about his drinking he also tried to make it that I was just in a mood and he did nothing wrong.
He also then told me that he only wanted one beer. That he just was working hard all week and figured he would relax with a beer. Which is a lie. He told me not that long ago that he found it pointless to have just one beer. That he doesn't even really like the taste of beer that much so when he has beer its with the intention of getting drunk.. otherwise its pointless to have one.
After the movie he left. I was suprised he was leaving but he said he had a stomach ache and wanted to go home. He made a joke that he was going to the bar to drink. He said he was joking but I honestly didn't believe it was a joke. I wanted to believe he went home but I really didn't. He lied to me already so why wouldn't he lie about that. The next day on the phone I asked him how the bar was and he was like I didn't go to the bar.. you really think I'd leave your place to go drinking all night. I said yes I do. I have no reason to not believe he would do something like that.
He was sick all day saturday (flu or hungover... I pick hungover) so he wasn't going to come to the concert with me if Darryl couldn't go. He said he would go but only if I couldn't get someone else to go. Strangely enough though he was fine on Sunday.
When we talked on Sunday we made plans to go out on Monday. He was supposed to call. He didn't.... not until 9. I finally gave up waiting and went out at 8:45. When I got home there was a message on my answering machine from him. He just said he was going to bed in an hour so to call if I get the message before then. Not one word about our plans or him not phoning.
The last time he stood me up it was because he worked until noon (was working nights) and slept late. Which was fine except that when he called he didn't say a word about standing me up. He acted like we didn't have plans. Until when he asked what I was doing I said I was waiting for a phone call from the person I had plans with. Thats when he apologized.
Yeah so he is very unreliable and doesn't think he does anything wrong. The first few months of dating someone is usually when you both are on your best behavior trying to impress the other person. If this is his best behavior... I would hate to see his behavior when the impress time is over.
Of course there were also other things that bothered me.. this was just what happened recent.
posted by Danikabur at 8:42 AM
6 Comments:
To Dump or Not to Dump. That is the question. I know the answer!!!
E
I guess there needs to be a question mark in there somewhere huh?
E
I know the answer too. LOL
Just don't know the answer to dump over the phone or make him drive 45 minutes just to get dumped.
if he can make you wait all night for a phone call, then why should you care if he has to drive 45mins to get dumped. but if you still has feelings for him & thinks that you won't dump him when you see him in person, then dump him over the phone to save the hassle of seeing him again.
JUST DO IT! it'll make you feel better.
a. :)
Looks like I don't need to... he hasn't called LOL
Wow, that sucks. I hope he's got his act together by now.
-Justin
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